Goals and plans can always change

Published 12:00 am Saturday, May 5, 2012

Although I still keep a journal, much of my life is also recorded in email, Facebook and text messages. Of the three, my daughter Victoria chooses to send me text messages when either of us is away from home. These nonverbal conversations are often ridiculous; however, some offer a peek inside of my youngest child’s thoughts.

“Keep your eyes open for an international hiking/backpacking summer camp.”

If only my phone had a sarcasm font, I would have responded to that message with “Of course, Victoria. You must have read my mind. That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

“Can you turn off my straightener?” Or I could sell it. She can’t use it while backpacking through Europe.

“I’m bored.” My default response for this and other random comments is “clean your room.”

“I wanna see the Northern Lights so bad.” Sounds great. Make it happen.

“Why don’t we recycle?” If you’ve seen my garage lately, you would understand my hesitation to collect trash. However, guilt over the possibility of setting a bad ecological example caused me to support, rather than shoot down her request to recycle.

“Remind me to review my life plan with you later.” Now this got my attention! Life plan? My 17-year-old has a life plan? I asked for and received additional information.

“Major in psychology and philosophy. I wanna work in a psych ward. Or be put in one…wherever the wind blows.” She typically uses levity to lighten a serious discussion.

When I returned home that evening, Victoria and I continued our conversation. Live. In person. My favorite method of communication. We spoke about the one short year remaining in high school, her college options and the need for me to find a suitable apartment for us to share. “You probably won’t want to be away from me during your first year, so I’ll just move wherever you go.” I typically use levity to lighten a serious discussion. And since I have no desire for international — or even local — hiking and backpacking, the least I can do is accompany her to college.

We also discussed the possibility of her goals changing in the near or even distant future, and I assured her this would not only be normal but even expected. I shared my belief that dreams and desires are used to motivate a person to take a step in the right direction. Once that step is taken, once that next level is reached, then you assess and reassess and figure out your next move. It’s OK not to have the total picture right now, but each small decision brings you one step closer to your destiny. The importance of staying tuned to God and praying for wisdom in each and every choice should never be minimized.

I should have told Victoria the many times God has led me, not just with open doors, but with doors that closed. I would have said, “Never force those doors open, even in the most bitter disappointments. Trust God’s guidance and don’t look back.” I certainly wish I could go back and tell her those things because Victoria admits she rarely finishes reading my columns. She said she reads the beginning, then drifts off to do something else.

I guess I’ll send her a text message.

Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com.