What determines a healthy relationship

Published 12:00 am Wednesday, June 16, 2004

Liz Johnson – Living Free

Why is it important for parents and teenagers to know the difference between a healthy and an unhealthy relationship? Children are not born knowing right and wrong behavior. These are taught to children by parents and other adults. As adults we must teach our children early in their lives to make good decisions and that all decisions have consequences.

A healthy relationship has open and honest communication and an even playing field on which partners share power and control over decisions. (A Parent’s Handbook: How To Talk To Your Children About Developing Healthy Relationships. Liz Claiborne, Inc., 1998.)

€ Learn about yourself – Take the time to think about who you are, who you want to be and how you want others to see you. Learn about building trust, respect, and affection for yourself and others.

€ Learn about others – Find out what kind of person you want to spend time with. What are the qualities you like in a person? What is most important to you in a relationship?

€ Include family and friends – Good and vibrant relationships welcome interactions with family and friends of both parties. Healthy relationships involve friends and families and do not isolate others.

€ Support each other – In a healthy relationship you and your partner feel good about yourselves and the relationship. You can talk with each other about problems and the relationship. You can have fun together; you trust each other; you respect each other. In healthy relationships, neither partner is afraid of the other. You want what is best for yourself and the other person.

… Make your feelings clear – It may seem easier at times to go along with what your date wants even if you don’t feel the same way. But you can’t have a healthy relationship with a partner who doesn’t respect you or who doesn’t care about what you really think.

€ Foster Respect – Respecting thoughts and ideas, needs and wants of both people, makes relationships safe and fun. In healthy dating, both people make decisions about the relationship together.

(A Dating Violence Handbook: Louisiana Coalition Against Domestic Violence)

An unhealthy relationship has an imbalance in which one partner tries to exercise control and power over the other through threats, emotional abuse and physical abuse. At its most extreme, an unhealthy relationship can include name-calling and insults, withholding of money or other resources, threats to isolate a person from friends and family, coercion, violent acts, stalking and significant physical injury. (A Parent’s Handbook: How To Talk To Your Children About Developing Healthy Relationships. Liz Claiborne, Inc., 1998.

Living Free Ministries

Liz Johnson

P. O. Box 2815

Reserve, LA 70084

(985) 652 – 9938