Dazed and Confused

Published 12:00 am Wednesday, February 3, 1999

By Lee Dresselhaus / L’Observateur / Febuary 3, 1999

So….. Recently I witnessed the complete demolition of a friend. Hisdestruction was swift and savage. He was pulled apart as he struggled toescape and I helplessly witnessed the horror of it all. What’s this, youask? Was he attacked by wild dogs? Nope. Was he swarmed by hungrypiranhas? Nope. It was worse, in a socially weird sort of way.He was ravaged by liberal feminists. During a conversation at a party – ofwhich he was not a part – my friend, whose thought processes were fueled by a large quantity of adult beverages which had the effect of stoking his courage while crippling his judgement, overheard several hard core, dyed in the wool, rabid feminists discussing their opinions of Man, The Oppressor. Most of these wise women shared the worldly view that weain’t fit to contaminate the air we all have to share on this planet. Myfriend then unwisely injected himself into the discussion and told these folks that he has never oppressed anybody and he just didn’t know what in the world they were all fired up about. They have the same opportunitiesthese days as anybody else, so stop whining and just go out there and get busy like the rest of us have to. They turned on him like hungry hyenas andfor 10 minutes gave him chapter and verse on the history of the species and all of the problems in the world. It turns out that we, men, are thecause of most of them. They wouldn’t let him get another word in todefend himself or his gender. He was shouted down before he couldconstruct another complete sentence and out of pity I eventually rescued him from his social demolition and led him away stunned and dismayed.

He had discovered, as have so many who have gone before him, that extremist thinking people have absolutely no tolerance for views other than their own, especially when they run in packs. This includes theaforementioned feminists – the real ones mind you, who live their entire lives according to radical feminist doctrine – and gun groups (anti AND pro), free speech advocates (who somehow manage to make sure that their point of view is the only one they’ll consider even if they have to stick their fingers in their ears and hum the Star Spangled Banner to keep from having to listen to you), animal rights weirdos, and whoever it is that keeps coming up with all the politically-correct hypocrisy we have to deal with in our every day lives.

Ever try to discuss any rational form of gun control with anybody from the NRA? Forget it. The very first thing they do is wave the Constitution inyour face and begin to quote the Founding Fathers. If you try to point outthat the Founding Fathers never envisioned some maniac spraying a schoolyard full of kids with his Constitutionally-protected AK-47 fully automatic assault rifle they label you a subversive who is unworthy of opinion in the Land Of The Free. Your opinion becomes invalid at that point.The other side of that particular coin are the gun control advocates who think all guns should be taken and melted down into plowshares or BMW’s or something. These people live on the Disney Planet (All Disney, All TheTime) where everybody is nice and life is perfect and you would never need a gun for anything. If you try to point out to them that we don’t needto get rid of guns, we need to get rid of weak-kneed politicians who won’t pass laws making the misuse of any gun a mandatory life sentence, they dismiss you as too conservative or as a member of the lunatic fringe like Ted Kazinsky or Charlton Heston, and once again the fingers go into the ears. In my humble opinion you should be able to have all the guns youwant. You should be able to have a pile of guns that an athletic kangaroocouldn’t jump over. But…. misuse one by robbing someone or shootingsomeone or shooting it up in the air on New Year’s Eve and you should be locked up for good. And that includes not securing the gun so that Billy BobJr. won’t get his grubby little hands on it and blow the face off of his babysister.

All that comes under the heading of that personal opinion that either side really doesn’t want to hear because it makes sense, and they just might have to change their mind if they listen.

But for now I have to go. I need to find someone to oppress. It’s a guything.

Lee Dresselhaus is a regular columnist for L’Observateur

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